You’ve heard the announcement, now discover what is next from Apple: The MacBook Shuffle!

Follow that carefully and you'll realize that the MacBook Air is a netbook. You don't want it to be a netbook because you want something cheap. Get in line. No one seems to realize that Apple makes an expandable tower either. The complaint about Apple's offerings being too expensive is as old as as the company. One suspects that with enough research they could find a comparison between the Timex Sinclair and the Apple II with people wondering why Apple didn't make a cheap compy to connect to your TV machine.

All hope isn't lost. The iPhone started out life as a Safari Pad. Here is a pic from the patent filing.

Really, that is an image form the actual filing. You see that and you think "Supersized iPhone, I'm on board!" Not so fast, see this wasn't a device meant for everyone, take a look at those fingers. This is a device for people diagnosed with carslamodoisis. The chief symptom being the inability to walk by a car without slamming your fingers in a car door. People with this condition can't use a regular keyboard so (the tips of their fingers being far too fat to use a keyboard) the device was designed for them. On a side note, carslamodoisis is usually misdiagnosed as sarcoidosis, then lupus and finally (about 40 minutes later) as carslamoidoisis. The treatment is simple, auto locking doors. Forgive the digression.

So that's why you won't be seeing a value meal sized iPhone anytime soon. What you will be seeing from the ten inch displays is this:

You'll need a key to sort that out. Let's go reverse order.

4. This is the replaceable battery compartment (cutaway) for a new Apple accessory, the iView. Why are the batteries replaceable? Because it gives Apple an excuse to stand the thing upright. On its own the iView doesn't do much. More on that later.

3. The button. This button doesn't do anything but it looks iPhonish so Apple is putting it on the iView.

2. Touch screen. When the iView is active you can use all the tricks you are use with the iPhone. Pinching, swiping etc.

1. The MacBook shuffle. This is where the meat is. It looks like a dongle but it is so much more. That dongle is actually a fully powered Mac that gets the internet anywhere. But Apple knows that you don't want to haul around something you can't slide in a pocket so the iView is just an add on. Most people will use the MacBook shuffle with the awesome earphones that come with the thing. Take a look:

The requisite key:

a) Apple ear buds. See the main way you browse the web with the MacBook shuffle is via audio. If you head to Apple Matters, for example, the MacBook shuffle will read the page to you. If you head to a porn site, well, Letters to Penthouse will seem like a grade school primer.

b) Top half. Top half is where you turn when it isn't possible to browse the web with your ears. You can see a small slice of a web page on the built in remote. Apple doesn't expect you to use this much.

c) The typing area. iPhoners will be familiar with this. You touch type on a virtual keyboard but since the keyboard was too big to fir on the MacBook shuffle's screen you'll have to move it around with your finger to get to all the characters. No big deal now that iTunes will generate a pile of web sites with the new Web Genius feature.

d) Non standard connector. Sure Apple could've gone with USB or even FireWire but the company opted to go with a new connector. Called iSpeed. The connector allows faser transfers of your cash to Apple.

There you have it. The next revolution to come from Apple. The best thing about this system? It will be price competitive with netbooks. A netbook might set you back $300 but a MacBook shuffle will only set you back $249. The earphones will be extra ($149) but you could use those cheesy Koss earphones you bought on the closeout endcap at target, you just won't be able to control anything. The iView is more expensive ($349) and really it will be mostly aimed at pros and road warriors. Apple will have the smallest lightest fully featured computer on the planet.